Jealousy-a big bug

"hey andy she is so beautiful na?", "do you know that he got a promotion?","hey you know she sings very well"....god i cannot take it.Really its not the others who cannot take the progress or happiness of others.But its me.Beleive me.Did not realise this till date.But recently when i was attending my regular counselling course this great incident happened.It was life changing as well.
One of my coursemate who also is an indian by origin and also my great friend always would be with me.We would have lot of fun together.But on that day another indian lady came to us and just spoke to her saying hey are you the same lady who used to RJ in the singapore indian music station? she was embarrased to answer it.But she told yes.I was shocked.Later as well heard that she was very good at it.After that conversation,did not feel like concentrating more on the class.I was not able to recognise my emotion.But was not feeling comfortable.It was so suffocating.However the lectures where over.Reached home with a heavy heart!!!!!!!!!
I could not keep it my tummy anymore.My tummy started to pain very badly.So informed my husband about it.He was very happy to hear about the RJ lady and also started prasing about her.I really got so upset.But did not know why.In the night while going to bed i opened my diary to share my day with my great book.I realised about this awkward but one of the common emotion "JEALOUS" .Then also realised that i have Vit 'J' in higher composition.I need to get some medication for this.
I really cannot take this.Yes i really.Whenever there is a good news which also matters to my age group people,i feel good at first.But later i feel demotivated.I feel iam nothing.I have not done enough good deeds in my life wherein people would be benefited.I am a waste body (in my language).
But there was another issue.If i have allowed this awkward emotion to come then i also need to make use of it in a better way.Right????
I need to use this as a weapon for me to motivate myself to as well progress in life.Oh please not again andy...Jab bhi mauka miltha hai...philosophy jhadni shuru....But yes sweety.This life is so beautiful.Why waste with thinking so much.The greatest enemy i founf of myself is thinking.I think so much .Not a single good one.But all the crap.But sometimes it does win over me.Just because sometimes i would be idle,it just occupies me like a monster around.But hey not anymore.Andy is full energetic to destroy you.
So that's the story of me and my stupid emotion.But i never deny,its always helped me to achieve my goals.
Therefore the moral of the story is..just drive you mind towars your goals,keep a objective that is clear to you and also vit 'J' in good amount.
Wow....i do write so beautifully....feeling J or i envy me??????...stop thinking girl...

Love
Andy